8:46 AM Thursday, January 7, 2021 (PST) Time in Buellton, CA

Final Dissolution - The Essence Of Insight

IF YOU COULD ERASE ALL THE MISTAKES OF YOUR PAST, YOU WOULD ALSO ERASE ALL THE WISDOM OF YOUR PRESENT.

I pray that I may see God's meaning in my life. I pray that I may gladly accept what God has to teach me.


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I am well. Pleased. Got up early and Lisa and I took Seth to school. Walked around campus for awhile, beautiful sunrise. I hear the quiet morning around me. I see the day warming up outside my window. I am good, and happy on the inside. I pretend to be strong and healthy. I feel optimistic. I touch on adult things but still am admittingly immature. I worry about Lisa and her mother being her. I am relaxed though. I understand all things will pass eventually, might as well make the best of it right now. I dream of having two working arms. I try to do the right thing. I am doing ok I suppose.

Today I will be Doing some work. Going to the Trauma Healing center to do a step one with a client. Picking Seth up from his first day of High School in Santa Ynez. Yesterday I was Hanging out around the house mostly. Bunty came in the late evening. Lisa and I went to Costco early in the day, had lunch with Jeanne - some pretty good meatloaf. Seth, school, work, family and just about everything except my left arm is going well and well, my damn elbow could use some attention. The most memorable thing about yesterday was the drive to Costco, seeing the beach and coastline, the sunroof open, music playing, hardly any cares. It was just nice getting out of the house. I didn't even need anything, I had no reason to go to Costco other that to just be with Lisa and go for a drive. I've been thinking allot about being in Buellton, being closer to most of my history.

Something I could do for Lisa is be a rock while her mother is staying with us.
Something nice Seth would appreciate is being picked up from school on time and not making a big deal about his first day.
Something Jeanne would appreciate is more lunches at her house.
and something Rachael would like is more time together, just brother and sister.

I am grateful for food, shelter, and being comfortable in such a trying time.
I am grateful for my friends and family - their health and saftey.
I am grateful for the way in which Seth's life is unfolding.

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